Humor Posts

My Airfone Adventure on United

Sometimes I could kill myself for not anticipating problems before they occur.
Last Thursday (after my redeye nightmare) I flew from Chicago to Frankfurt on United. My upgrade to business class cleared, I had an aisle seat assigned, and I had worked the previous seven hours straight in the ...
5 Comments

Texas-Oklahoma BBQ Brawl - Snow's vs. Leo's


Most sane people go watch a movie or find a happy hour when they get bored on a Saturday.  Me?  I drive 200 miles for lunch.  Yes, seriously.  That's my idea of fun.  And hey, it makes for a humorous "you did WHAT?!?!?!?!" reaction when I tell people about it.  ...
1 Comment

"You can't get in a long tube with a bunch of demons...it’s deadly!"

 
If you've ever wondered why some preachers need a private jet, you're not alone. Thankfully the answer is now a little clearer. You may just want to skip my commentary and go right to the video at the bottom.
The story starts around a kitchen table with renown ...
10 Comments

Flying Without A Shower or Bar? Emirates New Commercial With Jennifer Aniston

Imaging flying without access to a shower, a bed, or even a full service bar! Imagine flying with an airline that only offers you hot towels and peanuts! Imagine flying with crew members who snub you! Do you feel like you’re flying a US Airline? Well in that case you probably are! Meanwhile, ...
2 Comments

A Day in the Life of a Weary Road Warrior...And Some Humor

Let me tell you about my latest trip. I still wonder sometimes why I do this to myself, but am thankful that I still find fun in flying for the sake of flying. I hope you find this “Dear Diary” entry at least a bit humorous.
The trip started with a flight from Burbank to San ...
9 Comments

United Airlines to start docking frequent flier miles for late passengers

Posted April 1, 2015. Happy April Fools Day!
Missed check-in cutoff or credit card payment? Be prepared to cough up miles
April 1, 2015 | CHICAGO, IL: United Airlines today announced a major change to its MileagePlus frequent flier program that will penalize late-arriving passengers to the ...
10 Comments

Scorpions on a Plane!

I am not an animal person--to put it mildly. I was bitten by a dog when I was five while riding my bike outside my grandma's house and have always had a fear of dogs. I was stung by a bee...a dead one (that's another story) when I was 7 and hate most things with wings (if they don't bite, they use ...
1 Comment

Man Performs Striptease in Aisle on My United Flight

Now that I have caught your attention, let me tell you about a recent flight from Frankfurt to Chicago on United Airlines. 
I was seated in the first row of business class upstairs on a 747-400 (nearest the lavs and flight deck) and the cabin was full. As we neared the end of boarding ...
9 Comments

Delta Facebook Hacked with Dirty But Funny Pictures and Links

Call it revenge for Skymiles 2015 and the never ending devaluation to SkyPesos or call it just another prank, but Delta's Facebook page was temporary hacked today and displayed two different dirty links with a pictures.
The first link was titled “10 reasons women don’t give ...

A United FA Vents About Uniforms

Gary shares an e-mail making its way around the web from a disgruntled United FA about the new uniforms introduced by her company in 2013. She's clearly not a fan...
Who know if it is genuine, but it is entertaining and I have been flying United long enough to believe this is no ...
4 Comments

TOP SECRET Route from San Francisco to Seoul

A flyer on United noticed that his flight from San Francisco to Seoul was not exactly traveling in a logical direction, so he did what any savvy traveler would do in the age of onboard wi-fi: he tweeted United--

United responded:

To which he responded:
 
And UA ...
1 Comment

Illiterate Chinese Farmer Fined for Smoking Onboard Cathay Pacific Flight


The "glory days" of smoke-filled 747 lounges with baby grand pianos and circular staircases has been replaced with a harsh new reality--light up onboard and you'll face a heavy fine or jail time. From Britiain's finest news source, it appears that one illiterate Chinese farmer learned this ...

Qatar CEO Akbar Al Baker Charms A350 Inaugural Audience

I had this image of Qatar CEO Akbar Al Baker in my mind as a feisty yet unapproachable man who would not "lower" himself to interact with passengers, instead choosing to sit alone in his suite the entire flight as his entourage of personal FAs and staff fawned over him. The FAs still fawned over ...
1 Comment

The Zimbabwe Haircut

Four years ago I wrote a post entitled, “Haircuts when traveling” and I really meant what I wrote…one of my favorite things to do while traveling internationally is to get a haircut and I have now patronized barber shops on every continent but Antarctica. But after my latest ...
8 Comments

How I Learned That I Could Never Be A Farmer

My wife's suggestion seemed innocent enough: let's visit my cousins on the farm for a couple days before the wedding. I was at the farm once - in the winter of 2013 - and it seemed like an okay suggestion, as long as I could find internet. "Oh don't worry, you have your cell phone and USB internet," ...
4 Comments

Drunk On a Plane - Humor

Throughout my 9 years of having elite status across a slew of airlines, I will be the first to admit that I have been drunk on a plane a number of times! In fact, I will be the first to admit that when I fly longhaul, I enjoy sipping whiskey or scotch, get my buzz on and passing out in business ...
2 Comments

Airplane Feet Etiquette

I could never become a medical doctor because blood makes me squeamish. That's about it, though - most things do not bother me. Except bare feet. I don't know how those people with permanently dirt-stained, calloused feet can stand it: I hate to even take my socks off and avoid beaches like the ...
16 Comments

This Commercial Made Me Laugh

I've been on some rather unsafe planes over the years, from a rickety old TU-134 in Russia, to a poorly-maintained 727 in Bolivia, and a battered ATR-42 in Cuba, but nothing all that bad, nothing out of a horror story, like this commercial:

The ad is for a German travel agency and I just ...

Virgin America Introduces Total Temperature Control

Virgin America & Nest has teamed up to offer frequent flyers the options to control the temperature around each seat! The new Virgin America’s IFE known as Red is here and it’s going to give passengers more choices than ever--now introducing Inflight temperature control! No ...
2 Comments